Little Wren has a secret.
She begs me not to tell.
I’d rather sand off my eyebrows.
Or go skinny-dipping in Hell.
Her wishes are safe with me,
Dreams, plans, aspirations too,
Or I’ll self-immolate on jalapenos,
Or maybe flavor my coffee with poo.
I hope she finds better trees
Whether North, South, East or West,
Because she’s just the sweetest wren;
I wish for her only the very best.
Little Wren has a secret!
HUSH! Don’t you ever tell!
Or the awfullest things may happen:
Like I’ll scratch all your records from K-Tel!